Jackass 3D

***WARNING***

THE FOLLOWING REVIEW MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS AND CONTRADICTIONS THEREFOR MAYBE UNSUITABLE FOR SOME FUCKS. IT ALSO CONTAINS TALK ABOUT COCK THAT MAY MAKE YOUNG LADIES BLUSH AND CATHOLIC PRIESTS ROCK HARD

***YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED***

Firstly let me apologize for my lack of reviews, its been almost two months since my last post which is distinctly unfortunate for my many hordes of worshiping fans. The simple reason for my lack in putting finger to keyboard is directly due to the quality of cinematic treats bestowed upon me during the later part of this year. The quality actually being almost non existent to the point where I find myself wondering if paying a tenner to sit in a big room looking at a blank cinema screen, with no projected image while munching on a large bag of cool original doritos would be my preferred option over doing the exact same with the addition of getting someone to stick one of this seasons films on for me to ogle. I did in fact see 'Buried' which I considered to be amazing and as it turns out in my top five of this years films. I neglected to write a review of it however because doing so and being funny while showering praise with out saying he dies at the end turned out to be way to difficult so in short...

Buried gets...

                                                                                                                   

                                                                                                                      4 out of 5

You'll never see the ending coming!

So to make a long story even longer my lack of good things to write about ended when I visited Swansea in Wales where I discovered two things. 

1. Sunshine. As far as I'm aware the most sunshine ever recorded in the city since records began and

2.Jackass 3D

I have been a fan of Jackass since it first began ten totally shit years ago. It came at a time when I was reaching the mid point of puberty and all things non vagina related seemed like a waste of time. Yet there it was, Jackass, nothing but a bunch of grown men hurting themselves for my amusement without even the slightest promise of a breast or two (unless you count Prestons). The Tv show as it was finished after three short seasons leading almost directly into 'Jackass The Movie' which to this day marks as one of my all time favorite cinematic experiences. Followed a few years later was the brilliantly titled 'Jackass Number Two' which I to this day I kick myself for not seeing on a big screen as it is truly fantastic. And now ten years on from the start of the Tv show comes 'Jackass 3D'.

Firstly I will go on record as saying that 'Jackass 3D' makes the best use of the 3D format thus far. Be it by swinging a ball past your face into Steve-os jingle berries, shooting a veiny rubber penis into your eye or by showering you in confetti the 3D thing works perfectly with the world of Jackass. I found that the 3D aspect pulled me in much more than it did in something like Avatarded or Toy Story 3 and thats simply because Jackass is real life and therefore looks at its best in the 3rd dimension. Did you hear that Cameron? Now suck the juice from my meaty, sweaty ball sack. 

As for the stunts, those of you hoping to see the guys up the game danger wise will be disappointed. The stunts in many senses are a step back from 'Number Two'. However I do not see this as a step in the wrong direction as the stunts are more focused on the humour of the event rather than the potential for pain. Also incorporated are some of the original TV skits amped up to maximum to give Jackass a true send off and example being the 'Poo cocktail supreme' which while not being the movies funniest moment really does take you right back to where it all began.

A final note worthy point to make about 'Jackass 3D' is its soundtrack. Its been over a week since I saw the film now and I am still singing Twisted Sister everywhere I go, the reason for this is that the songs contained in the film match the footage so well that it makes most tracks totally unforgettable. Plus a keen ear will notice that the opening sequence features an opera version of Corona by the Minutemen, simple genius!

There are many nuggets of comedy gold to be found in Jackass 3D (some of which literally fly out of Dave Englands Arse) which will have you chuckling to yourself for hours after seeing them. I'd say see this while its still in cinema's, in 3D, it will be awesome on DVD/Blu but the experience of a gigantic 3 dimensional penis is something to behold, and something which no human should have to live without. For my money, its equal to the other two installments in terms of enjoyment and despite the gangs insistence on including the usual 'old Knoxville' segments which bore me the movie barely lets a minute go by without a true belly laugh, now thats rare.

Jackass 3D gets...

                                                                           

                                                                                                                   4.5 out of 5